Thursday, January 24, 2013 // 10:57 PM
I suppose posting here after 2 years is going to be interesting hm?
Different person, same feelings. The same feelings of extreme shittiness that pervade my mind and stay and corrode the rest of my thoughts. It's infecting every part of me now because i can't stop thinking about you, and whatever you plan to say and it's killing and i really doubt that i could really sleep tonight. I've waited so long for someone new to come, i really hope that it won't end in a similar way. I really hope that it doesn't end, period. Fuck this i'm screwing up my own head with my own thoughts and i just feel like bleeding and scarring again and again to remind myself to stop being such a moron at such things. And yet i still am. I still fall like i'm skydiving from a fucking space shuttle. The distance is really far, and the drop would kill me, but the lack of gravity builds the suspense doesn't it? i can't fall, i can only hope to fall hard enough. But i'm stuck floating in space. I've been stuck for 2 years. It'd be nice if i don't have to go through the same shit again because once is enough. I barely got out alive and i doubt that i will this time.
Note to self: stop being so stupid.
