Saturday, June 26, 2010 // 1:41 AM
when im not feeling good, i sleep early
when im feeling horrible, i stay awake
pattern lol
Knock Knock.
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// 1:05 AM
maybe having nobody see this blog is good
then i can live my life quietly without anyone knowing
now i feel stupid, talking to nothing
i want to comfort you and give you a hug when you need it
but you push me away and strike me down
whether you know it or not
do you know that your words stab me like knives?
it hurts
and you make me want to cry sometimes
and you
do you really hate seeing me with them so much?
do you resent me or them?
i don't know what to think
none of you make it easy for me
and now he has come again
everything is so confusing
and i dont have anyone to lean on
so what do i do?
do i keep everything to myself
or do i tell you how i feel?
but i dont want to let you know either
cos i dont want you to care just because you have to
whats the point.
i may as well be alone
Knock Knock.
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Thursday, June 24, 2010 // 9:37 PM
i dont know what im feeling.
so do you really not trust me at all?
would it make it better if i left you alone?
you'd probably hate to tell me
but you know that it will make me worry for you even more
but you probably prefer them over me
so its ok
as long as you're happy
i dont mind stepping back
i wont mind cutting myself out of your life
but be happy
please
Knock Knock.
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Monday, June 14, 2010 // 12:15 AM
im like this
only because of one thing
im afraid
my biggest fear is coming true
the fear or being alone
i feel detached
ignored
discarded
like some temporary thing that can be disposed of
my biggest fear is that there will only be me
that there will only be me here
who remembers
who never forgets
who constantly hopes, and wishes
i was left alone before
and i would hate to be left alone again
Knock Knock.
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Sunday, June 13, 2010 // 9:54 PM
someone help me with my god dam testimonial and ask mr fairuz to give me my bloody cca record
you make me feel so lonely
Knock Knock.
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Friday, June 4, 2010 // 8:14 PM
blog with a tagboard full of moronic ads --friggin annoying
k June 'hols' and we're going back to sch everyday
bloody retarded.
waiting for you to come online everyday
where are you today?
what are you doing?
it must be nice being around everyone you love
while i'm here, everyone i love seem to be forgetting me
or they dont seem to care
so i dont know
wish i could be there with you all
and i'm waiting for all of you to come back
cos everyday spend here
is like i'm being locked in a room alone
i can watch everyone walk past outside through one-way windows
but they cant see me and i cant get out
so what do i do?
banging on the door to call for someone seems desperate on my part
so maybe i'll just stay in my room
alone and cold.
Knock Knock.
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